My love affair with Chipotle

I have been going to Chiptole since my days working as an assistant at the Associated Press right out of college in the heart of Washington, DC. I loved it (please forgive them that they are owned by McDonalds). No matter how long the line, i got my food within minutes and within my budget (but then i was making Maryland Money and i was a shopping DIVA). The burritos are HUGE and are so damn tastey i dreamed about them longingly when i moved to a Chipotle free city. Three years i ate Chipotle bragging to anyone who had yet dined there. Everyone was instantly hooked like a junkie. "Give me more. Give me More"! they cried.
I always have the same thing- yes i like to try new things but it's so gooooooood- the marinated and grilled chicken burrito, sans beans, with cheese, tomato salsa and cilantro lime rice. Oh $hit! Damn just thinking about it makes me all excited. The hubbie hates burritos because i like to buy the big 2 pound f*ckers that take two hands to hold, but that was before this past week. He's in love too..but he has it as a salad (pu$$y).
I have a sad tale about my lovely burritos: last summer i flew up to MD for a week to introduce our new baby to my family. First and last place i went to was Chipotle. The morning of the day we were to fly out i spent around $30 on burritos for me to freeze when i ggot back to Charleston- that's $7 a pop! I put in the fridge knowing that it would be safe upon my return. Unbeknownst to me, i had a slew of cousins that came over that raided our fridge. They ate every last one. OMG! i was $hittin'. "Who ate my damn Chipotle"?!?! I stood mouth agape at the fridge. I screamed at my mother and father but neither would hurt me like that. "I bet it was (bleep*)" mom suggested.
My cousins were long gone with MY Chipotle swimming happily in their full tummies. "I hope you all get inagestion," i mumbled venomously under my breath. So now whenever i want to save my precious culinary treasure from vultures, i write with my huge sharpie Eat it and Die. God bless the mister who comes between me and my Chipotle. I guess you can say i'm like Joey on Friends "Joey Don't Share Food"!
*we will refrain from naming names to protect the guilty